I am feeling lonely. My relationship has broken up and I can not forget her.

When a relationship ends it can be very challenging and painful. Different people take different amounts of time to move on and it is normal to go through a grieving process as a result of the loss.

The way in which to move forward is also different for different people but here are some suggestions that may help:

  -  Allow yourself to feel the feelings and talk to friends and family. The grief process is a normal reaction to loss and needs to be experienced to help us move forward (http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/inside-out/201309/the-5-stages-grieving-the-end-relationship)

  -  Remove anything from your immediate environment that reminds you too much of your relationship. If you have items, music, photos etc that you might want to keep in the long run but are not helping you at the moment, give them to a friend to look after or put them in a box in the attic. Time is a great healer and you may find in time you can look at them without it causing too much pain.

  -  Create change. This is a new phase in life and it can help to gradually change things in your living space. Tidy up, reorganise, clear clutter maybe even change the furniture around or paint your bedroom a different colour. This change in our outer environment can help to change how we feel on the inside too.

  -  Try out new hobbies and see new places. Use this time to think about things you might like to try or places you might like to see that you haven't experienced before. Take a friend along and open your mind to new possibilities. When we undergo change that we would rather not experience our minds can get stuck in a rut. Doing something new can help the mind to see different possibilities.

  -  Keep exercising as a way to improve mood and be sure to eat regular meals and natural foods. As far as possible avoid excessive amounts of sugar, alcohol and refined carbohydrates as these can cause blood sugar drops which will adversely affect your mood.

  -  Be patient and kind with yourself. It takes time to grieve a loss and we can be impatient to move forward.

With best wishes

Marianna