One thing before I go further into this topic...
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Now, let's get back to the topic…
The menopausal ‘load’
Do you find that you're constantly multitasking? Are things going on in your brain all the time, such as, "I've got to do this. I've got to do that. I mustn't forget to do this." Do you find that you're juggling between your home life, family, work, friends, and social life? Do you find that there are just not enough minutes in the day and you're forever on the go?
I've been focusing on menopause for about 20 years, and I've noticed, in that time, that life is a lot tougher for women now for all sorts of different reasons. Being extra busy or doing too much can have a huge impact on your physical and emotional well-being too. So, there's a huge load put upon us at this time.
You may be busy looking after your family. Perhaps you still have children at home, especially since a lot of you are having children later on in life, which means you may be hitting menopause just as your children are hitting their teens. I think that can be the worst combination ever; mum going through menopause and teenage daughter going through adolescence at the same time.
You may have part-time work, or work full-time. You may be looking after elderly parents or elderly relatives. So, you're going to have very little time for yourself.
If this happening generally in your life, then imagine putting hormonal changes into the mix as well. It's going to put a huge extra layer of stress and everything into your life.
It's a bit like ducks. You see them gliding effortlessly over the pond, but underneath, their little legs are going like mad. That's what's happening inside you. So, you may not necessarily notice too much going on externally (on the surface), but internally, your body is trying so hard to keep its balance. And if you have that going on, as well as everything else that you're trying to do in your life, it's no wonder you can end up having issues and symptoms getting worse as well.
Multitasking and menopause symptoms
When you're trying to multitask, and when you've got all these things going on in your head, "I've got to do this, I've got to do that," it's going to raise your heartbeat, so you may find you get palpitations more often. It can raise blood pressure. And blood pressure is a silent menopause symptom. A lot of people have it without realising it. It can also increase your anxiety, regardless of whatever else is going on.
It can also take a toll on brain function. You’ve got all this stuff going on in your head, and then you wonder why you're getting brain fog or that it's getting worse. You're forgetting things; you can only cope with so much inside your brain at any given time, and very often, in perimenopause and menopause, that load is massive. So, that's going to interfere with our cognitive function as well.
If you're trying to do too much at once, you can then end up actually being less productive, and less efficient, making you more prone to making mistakes and forgetting more things.
And, of course, what happens then? Because we're trying to do everything, because we're trying to be superwomen, we then start berating ourselves. We start criticising ourselves, and that then becomes a vicious circle. We become more and more down, more and more in a low mood because we can't cope and our once super-efficient self is becoming less efficient.
A lot of you tell me that because you're trying to do all this, while internally trying to cope with the hormonal changes, your family starts to notice that you may not be quite as efficient, as you forget to remind them to do things. What often happens is that we care for ourselves, we care for our families, and very often, we're the ones that organise everybody else. So, if you start to be less efficient at doing that, they start getting annoyed with you because you've forgotten to remind them to go to the dentist, put the car in for the MOT, or remember to do something else.
Again, all of this can put so much extra pressure on us, and it's no wonder we end up with things like anxiety and low moods as well. So, this is a very big issue. I do talk about it a lot, but I think it's becoming more and more important that we start to look after ourselves.
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What to do to help yourself
Now, how do you cope with this? I know that most of you out there are going to say, "I can't change things." You know, our lives are so busy. We're so ingrained that we can't allocate more time to the day because it's already all taken up. But it's really, really important here to try and change things to take that pressure off it. It's about trying to focus a little bit more on what is really important.
I have a little saying, and that is, "Don't do today what can be done tomorrow, the day after, or next week, or even next month." We just put so much pressure on ourselves to try and deal with things, immediately.
Make lists. And I'm a great believer in lists and Post-it notes. I have lists everywhere and Post-it notes to write things down that I need to remember. I'll stick them somewhere where I will see them to remind me to do something at a certain point. This can take the pressure off a little.
Support your cognitive function. Drink plenty of water daily because dehydration can be a big factor in making this situation worse. Make sure that you're eating a varied diet and getting plenty of nutrients. Your brain needs lots of different nutrients to keep going. I would also suggest a fish oil supplement. For those of you who are vegetarian or vegan, you can look at a flaxseed oil supplement. And very often, that can give your brain a little bit of a boost.
Support your nervous system as well. That’s really important. When we're trying to juggle things and run from one place to another, our nervous system can get really pulled down. You can look at something like our Menopause Support tablets because they contain magnesium which is known to support the nervous system. Magnesium also contributes to a reduction in tiredness and fatigue, so another good reason to increase your intake.
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Possibly one of the hardest things, and I know most of you out there will go, "I can't do it," is rest and relaxation. You need to take care of yourself, because if you don't look after yourself, who's going to? And if you can't look after yourself and you get very weary, if you get run-down, then you can't take care of other people either. So, taking care of yourself will pay dividends in the long run because you will feel better and you will feel more efficient at coping with everything else that's going on. Remember the ‘me-time’ too. Spend it doing something for yourself that you like to do. Something that relaxes or even energises you. It could be reading a book, going for a walk, or just listening to some music by yourself. Thirty minutes ‘me-time’ every day is vital, not a luxury.
And one more thing, and I must admit, for me, this can be the hardest thing to do; ask for help! If you're really struggling at home, if you're struggling at work, if you just can't fit everything in and you're getting more and more tired and run-down, then ask for help. There's nothing shameful, there's nothing weak about asking for help. You might be surprised at how willing other people are to help you and take a little bit of the load off your shoulders.
I hope you found this one helpful. It's a huge thing. You know, today, as women go through perimenopause and menopause, we're having to contend with so many different things that even our mothers and our grandmothers certainly didn't have to cope with in their particular menopause time.
If you have any stories, if you have any tips, what did you do to help yourself cope with all of these changes that are going on? Please share your stories. I love reading them.
Until next time, have a lovely week, and take care.
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