Menopause and driving
A few weeks ago, I posted a blog on strange symptoms of menopause. And one of the things I mentioned was about not being able to park straight. And I was just so amazed at how many of you got back and commented, saying that menopause has had a big impact on your driving. So, I thought, right, let's look into this a little bit.
Menopause can have a profound effect on many aspects of your life, from your work life to your relationships, but something that isn’t talked about enough is how it can affect your driving!
If your driving is affected, that's going to have another huge impact on your freedom and independence. It may affect the way you get to work if you can't drive. It may be that you drive for a living. It may well be that you live in rural areas where your car is your only lifeline.
Even the most seasoned driver can experience problems in perimenopause and menopause, and this can be down to several symptoms.
So, let’s take a look at 5 of the main symptoms that can affect your driving ability and what you can do to help lessen their impact.
1. Anxiety, fear, and lack of confidence
Increased anxiety, feeling more fearful and losing your confidence are common symptoms and ones that can have the biggest impact on your driving.
Now, very often, and I know a lot of you have commented on this, you're suddenly scared to drive. You're getting panic attacks either thinking about it, or you're getting panic attacks whilst you're driving. You may find that you become much more anxious when there's a lot of traffic. When you get to junctions, you may not dart out as quickly. You may take a lot longer. And of course, then there's this queue behind you with other drivers getting impatient, that can compound the whole feeling of panic and pressure.
What can help?
So, what to do here is try and avoid busy times on the road. Very often, it's about planning in advance what you can do to make your driving experience less stressful, so just plan ahead. If you do have to go through traffic, leave a little bit earlier or leave a little bit later. And this is really important,
maybe ask at work if you can have more flexible hours so that you can fit your driving in to be more comfortable than just trying to get through the terrible traffic.
Try to give yourself extra time to get there as well, so that if anything does happen, if you have to slow down, you're not then panicking about being late.
Slow, deep breathing is so important whilst you're driving, so get into the habit of learning to do lots of structured, slow breathing.
You can also look at one of the Flower Essences, such as Confidence Essence. Also, take your magnesium in the morning before you go out to work to calm your nervous system down. And you can also go with a Passionflower spray. So, Passionflower is very good for anxiety and stress, and you can spray it into your mouth just before you get into your car.
2. Reduced concentration and memory lapses
Being unable to concentrate and forgetting things are two symptoms of the dreaded menopausal brain fog. This can be a really scary one. If you're driving, you have to focus, you have to concentrate and, very often, it can be really difficult to maintain your concentration. You can zone out. I do it myself. You get to a place and you suddenly think, "Oh, I don't actually remember getting there." So, your focus and attention have been elsewhere instead of on your driving.
It may be that you have to think twice about changing gears, when to start slowing down before a junction, or even when to overtake, so that can all feel more panicky. It can also be that you have to think more about where you're going. There are so many routes that you take that are just second nature; but suddenly you find you've ended up on the other side of town.
I've done it. I did it last week. I was coming back from the airport on the motorway which I've done heaven knows how many times before, and I ended up in the wrong lane and then down some dark, back road. And I had to find somewhere to turn and head back.
So, your concentration can dip very quickly and it is annoying. And it's very, very frustrating as well.
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3. Reduced spatial awareness
This is the one I had talked about before, where you might find that you can't judge the parking space. You're thinking, "That's not big enough to get my car in." Or, like me, you end up parking at an angle rather than straight on.
It may well be that you're having problems reversing now, or you don't get your judgment right on going around a corner. And again, especially if you're doing motorway driving, you've got to be much more spatially aware when you're overtaking other cars and how close or far away you are from the car in front as well, so that can be a really scary one.
What can help?
So, for this one, definitely take time to do all these spatial awareness tasks. Maybe just drive that little bit slower, be more aware of what's going on, and perhaps just run things through in your head before you actually drive. Sometimes, a little bit of mental rehearsing can make a lot of difference.
Just be aware, though, that with all these issues, especially the spatial awareness one, it's a phase. It's all to do with the change in hormones, and once this starts to ease off, you should find that this particular issue starts to dissipate as well.
4. Hot flushes
If you are driving and you get a hot flush, you can feel panicky. You can lose concentration. You're suddenly feeling extremely hot. Your focus can go as well, so that's a really, really horrible one.
What can help?
With this one, definitely focus on the slow breathing.
For those of you who've been following my blog for a long time, one of my stories is that I travel a lot. I live south of Glasgow, so I have to drive through Glasgow to get to Edinburgh to see some of my family. And I noticed that at exactly the same point in the road a few miles outside Glasgow, I would get a big, hot flush. And I couldn't figure it out until I realized what exactly was going on.
Driving through Glasgow, and those of you who live there will know what I mean, it's so nerve-wracking because, at one point, you've got five or six lanes. You've got cars coming in from the right and cutting across, cars coming in from the left and cutting across, and everybody's zigzagging and driving about two feet apart.
So, I found that I was hanging onto the steering wheel for dear life and holding my breath just trying to concentrate. And I realised that for those few miles, my nervous system was taking quite a battering. And then once through Glasgow, I would go, "Ahh," and that's the point where the hot flush kicked in.
So, if you find you're getting a hot flush at the same point in the road, it may well be just how you've been driving for the last few minutes beforehand.
This is where the focus on breathing really comes in handy because, as I say, I was holding my breath and that certainly didn't help. And make sure you have plenty of water with you, because dehydration will compound this one as well.
5. Joint and muscle aches and pains
Joint pain and muscle aches can cause mobility problems when driving. If you're starting to stiffen up, that can seriously affect your driving. You may find it more difficult to stretch to the pedals. You may find it more difficult to turn the car wheel or even turn your head if you need to look behind you for any particular reason.
Sometimes if you end up with hip pain as well, which can make it more difficult to use your feet and your legs, especially during long drives. Driving short distances is okay, but some women find that by the time they've done a long drive, they're so stiff. They're in a lot of discomfort.
What can help?
For this particular one, really important: loads of water. You can try magnesium as well to help with muscle aches and pains. You can look at herbs such as Devil's Claw and Arnica for joint aches and muscle aches and pains.
Again, with this particular one, it's usually just a phase; so just be aware that things might ease off the further through the menopause you go.
Other things that can help
Remember, one of the best things you can do which will help with most of these symptoms is to calm your nervous system down before you drive. So, before you go out in your car, do some deep breathing, and take some gentle herbs or Flower Essences to help calm you down. Plus, remember to plan well in advance.
The other thing that can be really helpful, especially if you're forgetting where you're going, is to use a satnav. My family think I'm absolutely crazy because if I'm going to visit any of them (some of them are 70-80 miles away), even though I know where I'm going, I always put the satnav on, because I find it very reassuring. So, don't forget to use these little bits of technology if you can.
Another important thing is, don't drink coffee before you drive because again, a good number of years ago, I'd left my daughter's house in the afternoon after a really strong cup of coffee. And a little while down the road, I had the most tremendous attack of palpitations and I honestly thought I was having a heart attack. Luckily, I was just approaching a big set of traffic lights, so I could actually calm myself down. But definitely avoid the caffeine or anything really stimulating before you go out the door.
The other thing I really would advise every woman in the UK is to take your advanced driving test. There is an organisation called the Institute of Advanced Motorists (now known as IAM RoadSmart) who do courses. And if you don't live in the UK, there are probably similar organisations locally, so really look into it.
With the Institute of Advanced Motorists, I had to do the course for work, and it's one of the best things I have ever done for driving. You do a short course and they get rid of all your bad habits, especially if you've been driving for a good number of years. The confidence it gives you to be able to cope, to be more aware, to get rid of that fear of driving, makes the course seriously worth it.
If you don't want to do the whole course, there is a ‘mature driver review’ you can do. It lasts about an hour. So, you just take a drive with an instructor, and they will just point out all the things that you may be doing wrong.
But honestly, if you are finding that the menopause or perimenopause is affecting your driving, look this up and go for it, because it could make all the difference between you being so scared to drive that you don't drive again, or for you to continue with happy motoring for a long time.
So, I hope you found this one helpful. If any of you out there have any other tips that have helped you cope with all of this driving in this day and age, then please do share them with us.
And until next time, take care.
You may also find these topics helpful:
Signs your nervous system is struggling & how to support it better during menopause
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